My last interview was with a lovely elder living in a beautiful retirement community in Sacramento. An accomplished artist, she conveyed how comfortable she was living there and was enjoying the camaraderie of people her age. She now has time to indulge herself in art and writing which is another passion she enjoys. But when I asked about why she left her private residence, she became very serious. A medical crisis snowballed and she no longer felt safe to remain in her home.
Her story is similar to so many elders who felt compelled to leave their homes. In Mrs. D’s case, an allergic reaction to a prescribed medication nearly cost her life. Her family members, which all live close by, happen to be gone on a group vacation. Mrs. D was left to call an ambulance on her own and make decision by herself while going through a medical emergency. She never returned home.
“It was awful,” said Mrs. D, 89. “I just couldn’t go back to living alone. I told my son to pack up the house and sell it. I couldn’t even bring myself to go over there. I had so many things that had to be dealt with.” Mrs. D left all the details to her family. She was fortunate to have family that could take the time to take care of everything. But she said it was still a very difficult time in her life. The move was not in her plans. That was a big part of the problem. Having a plan and a back-up plan during senior years can make life so much easier. Mrs. D lived with family for a while and is now residing in her second retirement community. Moving is always difficult but more so for seniors.
For most seniors, staying in their homes for as long as possible is what they hope for. Knowing all your options as you grow older is your first line of defense for spending your later years the way you want. If your desire is to stay in your current home, you need to know what services are available to you make that possible. In-home care services are available but you need to know what they are and who you will want to use before it becomes necessary. You also need to be aware of what in-home skilled nursing services are available through your medical insurance. Should you need to recuperate in a skilled nursing facility, where would you go? During a crisis is the worst time to make these decisions. You need to do your “homework” before a crisis happens.
Babe Wilson found herself looking for a convalescent facility while suffering from a broken back. “It was awful,” said Wilson, in her middle 80’s. “We finally found a place but it wasn’t much more than a step up from an old folk’s home and boy was it expensive!”
Talking to family members is a good place to start. Let them know what you want. Find out how they will be willing to help, should you have a need. Most care is still given to elders by family members. If you don’t already have a medical directive, this would be a good time to create one and give one to each family member. You can find a template for helping you decide your preferences on the AARP website – http://assets.aarp.org/www.aarpmagazine.org_/articles/family/caregiving/CaringValues.pdf
Will it be possible for you to stay in your home if you suffer a loss of mobility or need extra care? Many homes just aren’t designed to age-in-place. Stairs, steps and small bathrooms are just some of the problems you might encounter if you need to use a walker or wheelchair. Homes can be remodeled to make them senior-friendly. Many seniors find the costs and the inconvenience more than they want to deal with.
Something to consider is moving to a senior community where services are available right within the community. Seniors now have many more options than ever before. Continuing care retirement communities (CCRC’s) are one option. These senior communities require a large deposit and then a monthly fee which is determined by what accommodation you need. Different levels of care are available within the community. Private cottages, apartments, skilled nursing, assisted living and memory-care are all usually available within the community. Social activities, exercise classes and food services make these communities enjoyable to seniors. The cost to live in a CCRC varies but nearly all are very expensive.
Assisted living communities are another option for seniors. Senior apartment complexes are another. Many of these communities offer just one level of care that might not be for you. If your needs change, another move will probably be in your future.
The newest senior communities are combining all the elements of the other communities and offering home ownership. Many seniors do not want to give up owning their own home but they know there’s a good chance they’ll need more services and options in the future. The newest senior retirement communities offer senior-friendly homes, in gated communities where services are available when needed and only paid for when needed. Landscaping, yard-care, exterior home maintenance are all provided by a homeowner’s association. A Lodge is within the community where assisted living and memory care is available and homeowners have priority placement. Meals can be ordered and delivered to the senior’s home. A maintenance worker is available to help seniors for chores and projects they aren’t able to do themselves. Transportation is also available. Activities, continues learning experiences and exercise facilities are also included in the cost of the HOA dues.
One homeowner, who bought in the new Lakemont Homes Eskaton Village Roseville, described why he and his wife chose the senior community. “We chose to decide our fate before our fate decided for us,” said Bill Merz. “We weren’t going to wait for our kids to pile us in the back of their Escalade and find ourselves living in their basement!”
One service that might help in your decision making is working with a senior care manager. These experts talk to you about what you want and what you need. They assess your abilities and then do research to find out what is available to you. They make recommendations and know the service providers so they can guide you to people who are reputable in the business.
Here are just a few of the resources found on the internet to help you make decisions regarding your senior years.
http://www.eskaton.org/ - Eskaton is a leader in senior services providing a wide array of services for over 40 years.
http://www.housing-options.com/housing-options - a reference service for elders and their caregivers in the Sacramento area.
http://assets.aarp.org/external_sites/caregiving/multimedia/EG_HousingOptions.html - AARP website
http://www.eskatonvillages.com - private homeownership, multi-service community, assited-living/memory care, social and recreational center
www.aplaceformom.com – a referral service for senior housing options.
Karen Everett Watson – is a freelance journalist and proprietor of Legacy Letters, copywriting services. She works from her Galt country home and has just completed her studies for a certificate in gerontology at Sacramento State. You can reach her at Watson@softcom.net.
